- A person who feels anger and/or jealousy for someone who has succeeded in something they have worked hard for.
- A being that speaks badly, and/or takes negative actions in attempt to create problems for a successful person.
Clearly, being a "hater" is not a good thing. And how we handle other
people's success, especially when things may not be going so well for
us, is an indicator of our maturity and belief in ourselves.
So what do you do when you see someone thriving with the
opportunities, recognition, clients and wins that you want for your life
or business? You learn to celebrate other people's success.
If you master generating genuine happiness for other people, not only
will you find a cure for the envy, which can sabotage your success, but
there are additional benefits as well. Here's what you open the door to
as you welcome and express joy for others:
- Freedom from frustration and worry.
When you see another person's win as a loss for you, you pave the way
for discouragement and resentment to set in. Instead allow other
people's success to ignite hope for the success coming in your time of
harvest.
- More opportunities to be happy! Rejoicing with
others creates an opportunity to multiply the good times you get to
celebrate. By seizing every chance to sincerely congratulate other's on
their success, you are creating an atmosphere for others to be willing
to celebrate your successes.
- Improved relationships with others. Healthy
relationships involve sharing both ups and downs. People are more likely
to respond positively to you if they sense that you're truly happy for
them.
- Good karma. You reap what you sow. Giving unselfishly creates a win for everybody.
I know, it all sounds good, but how do you actually pull it off -- and do it sincerely? Here are seven ideas:
- Proactively look for opportunities to shine a spotlight on someone else.
Keep in touch with what's going on in the lives of the people around
you. Others may be bashful about mentioning their own victories but
still appreciate having their efforts recognized.
- Create a daily gratitude list. It's difficult to be
happy for other people when you are dissatisfied with your life. Remind
yourself of all the wonderful things you have to be grateful for. Go
one step better and share one thing a day with someone.
- Be aware of your jealousy. Weigh the consequences
of jealousy and envy. Be honest with yourself when you notice your
thoughts and feelings heading down a negative path.
- "Fake it till you make it." Or as Karen Salmansohn
says -- "Faith it till you make it." It's okay to use some artificial
gestures to get started. Even if you're not purely happy that your
ex-husband got an award, you can say something gracious.
- Start with the people you love. Charity starts at
home and so should the celebration. It might be difficult to get
instantly excited about the lives of strangers. However, you can start
by focusing on the people closest to you. For example, cheer with
enthusiasm when your cousin wins an award, your brother gets a
promotion, or a friend successfully closes a deal.
- Work your way up to dealing with the hard stuff.
For example, celebrating with someone that got something you wanted for
yourself or being happy for someone you believe is undeserving.
- With practice, you'll be able to tackle the more sensitive issues.
When you find the techniques that work with the people you love, you
can use those same strategies with more challenging opportunities.
So the next time someone you know gets great news, don't hate --
celebrate with them. Remember, you reap what you sow: You can look
forward to welcoming more joy into your own life as you celebrate other
people's success.
